Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Diaries

by nick rauge

Diaries are sacred possessions, as they are also a rather taboo subject for conversation, which means that every word written in this article is an attempt not to trip on the wires that any comment could set off, especially if the comment is harmless, but not taken in the correct manner. Diaries are an item usually kept by a predominant number of females, but I will direct this article at any member of both sexes, who may keep, or may have at one time, kept a diary.

Diaries can be a very integral part of one's life, especially when one is active on the dating scene, and there is no time more risky for the diary writer, than when they are in hot pursuit of romance. The early parts of relationships are usually quite volatile, which makes the addition of a diary something that should be kept rather well hidden. It is understood that many people may share some of their entries with their closest pals, but many do not, and it is especially noteworthy that the partners in the relationship know nothing of such diaries' existences, or that would be an invitation for them to see what is really thought of them. Now, this is not where I say it is okay for someone to snoop in another's diary, but it all has to do with the stages of the relationship. If someone is dating many people on an inclusive basis, then their better halves should know nothing of the diary, but once a relationship reaches a certain point the other person will most likely find out about the existence of such a treasure, and it is at that time that all previously held grievances should be aired, because then the free-for-all begins.

Mutual respect should be a very dominant issue in any relationship, and that goes for those who know their loved one is keeping a diary, especially if their relationship has hit the long-term. If the partner reads entries aloud, and then tends to flaunt the existence of such a book, then they probably will yield certain information that is in the book, but questions should be asked, as reading the entries on your own would be an utter violation of trust. Also, if one knows of the existing diary, but it is never brought up, than that means that the contents are not just a means of documenting certain events, but is a private avenue for an outlet of feelings, which no one else should know, unless they are summoned to such information by way of the owner.

This is a very tricky subject and should not be breached by anyone sharing a certain semblance of respect with their partner. With that being said, there is a time in most relationships where the diary's holder can adequately let go of all their previous secrets, and release the burden by informing their partner. This does not mean that the opposite course of action is an obvious sabotage of the relationship, but instead may mean that there are some things that are sacred to the individual. The circumstances, consequences, and rules of betrayal all depend on the specific person who owns the diary, as well as the validity of the relationship that the writer holds with their partner(s).

Secrets are never meant to escape, but most of the time they are released in accidental, yet stunning manners, which sometimes hurt others, but also help others to understand the problems, or joys, that one constantly experiences. A diary can sometimes hold these burdens like caged beasts, but it is important to understand that the writer gets to decide if their beast is willing to escape, or would rather succumb to a lonely eternity.

About the author

Nick Rauge is a professional writer and editor of the website duran duran. He collects posters like bridget jones wallpaper from the movie bridget jones in his sparetime.

No comments: